If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
