"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
