in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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