I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
