I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
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