If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
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