Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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