So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
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