I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
