In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
