so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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