Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize