This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
