hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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