I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Oh god it's open bar.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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