We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
two words: eviction party
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
