I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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