your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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