Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
