About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
