Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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