the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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