the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
