Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
