To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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