I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
