she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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