I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
