party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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