she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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