was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
my poor anus
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Randomize
