well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
