Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
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