If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
