How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
