Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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