I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Randomize
