I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize