I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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