he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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