He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
