I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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