This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Don't EVER smell your tampon
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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