All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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