Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Randomize