yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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