a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize