I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
