He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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