I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
