yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
