ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Randomize